'We all have flaws and weaknesses, but they do not define us.'

Greetings and blessings to all of you.

We’re going to talk more about what I just said in a minute. But, first, thanks for joining me for our fourth reflection as we continue our journey together through this season of Lent.

Last week we spent time reflecting upon the lie that “I am what other people say or think of me” and how sometimes we listen to the voices that tell us that we are no good, a failure, worthless, ugly, stupid, a nobody, etc.  But the truth is that we are beloved children of God, created in God’s image and likeness, regardless of our imperfections.

We must always remember that the Lord loves us perfectly because he has created us.

This week I want to talk about the fourth lie shared from the late Fr. Henri Nouwen – I am nothing more than my worst moment.

We have all had bad moments in life, whether it be failing at something or committing a sin because of bad choices. These choices could turn out to be devastating or we were severely criticized for something where we failed to measure up to someone else’s expectation … and who knows what else. Or I’ve know people who have spent a lifetime trying to earn their father’s love and never could measure up.

We’ve all had moments we wish we could take back. No one is perfect. Some people have had moments where they feel like the results have ruined relationships, or ruined their futures, even their lives. In light of those moments, it’s easy to be deceived into thinking the sum of who we are is nothing more than our worst moment. When we feel overwhelmed with guilt, shame, regret, and despair, it’s easy to believe that our worst moments are the totality of who we are. And it is easy to condemn ourselves and difficult to rise above whatever the failure might have been. But Jesus did not come to condemn the world, he came to save it. Any condemnation we might feel is not from Jesus. It is from the Evil Spirit or from our own broken human spirit.

Friends, any failure we might have had is an event and not a person. Events have a beginning and an end. They don’t define who we are. An event is not our identity. Nor is it the totality of our experience.

We all have flaws and weaknesses, but they do not define us.  Our true significance is so unshakable that even our worst failure can’t wipe that out. We are bigger than any one moment in our life.  We all must refuse to accept our identity in any one action – good or bad.  If we fail to do so, then we will live a false identity and not as the beloved son or daughter of God that we are.

St. Paul in his letter to the Ephesians describes who we are from God’s perspective. “For we are God’s (handiwork) masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he prepared for us in advance.”  Eph. 2:9

There is a beautiful Lenten story from John’s Gospel about the Samaritan woman at the well. She had made a mess of her life, poor choice after poor choice, failure after failure. Then she came face to face with the loving gaze of Jesus. The Samaritan woman was staggered by Christ’s ability to see into her inmost being. She was amazed at his intimate knowledge of the human heart, and of her heart in particular.  He has the power to see into the depths of our spiritual heart.  He sees not only our failures. He also sees the “sleeping saint in the soul of every person”.  The essence of our identity and worth, the source of our dignity, is that we are loved by God. As St. John Paul II said: “We are not the sum of our weaknesses and failures; we are the sum of the Father’s love for us and our real capacity to become the image of his Son.”

This whole story is about Jesus’ benevolent love for us.  He offers new life to all of us if we but only seek to meet Christ with the openness of the Samaritan woman.  Through her encounter with Jesus, as she asked for the life-giving water, she began to experience a new life....a life that began to fulfill her deepest longing ... a life that would lead her out of her loneliness and sinfulness. She began to discover her truest identity - the sum of the Father's love. That is what Jesus came to reveal to her.

In this story, the Lord was reaching out to her, inviting her into a relationship that would forever change her understanding about herself, offering her far more than she could ever imagine.  Following her encounter, she couldn’t resist sharing her new found freedom and identity. Then she became the voice of the benevolent lover, Jesus.

In this next week, I invite you to take some time with the Lord, gazing upon him in prayer, and reflect upon how we have bought into the lie that “I am nothing more than my worst moment.” 

Ask Jesus to deepen in your heart the truth that you “are not the sum of your weaknesses and failures; but the sum of the Father's love for you.”  That you are a masterpiece in the eyes of God.